David Pisarra January 3, 2020 The Alienated Parent’s Easiest Mistake For an alienated parent who has not spoken to their child in months or perhaps years, the easiest mistake they can make is to blame themselves and assume that the emotional distance between the child and the estranged parent is to the fault of the alienated parent somehow. Most alienation cases involve an alienator who is suffering from the devastating effects of a narcissistic personality or a borderline personality disorder, occasionally they are histrionic but usually it is the narcissist that is the most difficult to deal with in these child custody cases. The targeted parent is not to blame in most alienation cases because one of the hallmarks of an alienation case is that there is no factual basis for the severing of the parent child relationship. In those cases where there is a basis, such as child physical or sexual abuse, the severing of the relation does not fit the definition of Parental Alienation. Thus the estranged or alienated parent should not feel guilt or shame, or think that the distance or negativity of the relationship is about them.